markham street prophet

I went on a first date not long ago. It wasn't as awkward as much first dates, because I had known the guy for a while. We settled in at the bar for fun night of drinking and sports. After a few minutes we realized the bar was a mecca for the weird.

There was one guy that was jumping from table to table hitting on girls there with their boyfriends and generally acting like he owned the place. There were random couples - from trendy to sleazy. There was even a band that would drop random, awkward sexual innuendo into their act. Towards the end of the night a lady even treated the bar by lively playing the spoons.

We noticed an elderly guy sitting alone. He was probably close to 80 - balding, age spots, and drunk off his ass. He was making conversation with two girls in their early 20s. I watched him for a while and finally saw him stand up and stumble in my direction. He came up to us and put one arm around me and one arm around my date.

"Can I tell you guys something?" he slurred.

We looked at each other then to him expectately, "Sure..."

He whispered in my ear, "You two are the most in love couple I've ever seen."

I had just enough time to think to myself, "Oh my GOD, don't repeat that!" before my date asked, "What?"

So he whispered in his ear, "You two are the most in love couple I've ever seen." He then looked back and smiled at me.

I stammered, "Thanks..."

He nodded, removed himself from the group hug, stumbled out of the bar, and was never seen again.

This moment didn't ruin the date. We actually both attract crazy people and are rather used to this sort of thing. I was laughing so hard I was crying.